So you think you can’t sell? Debunking the Sales Myth

It is not that you can’t sell, it’s just that you’re having an identity crisis.

Many people say “I couldn’t be in sales, I hate selling” or “I love what I do, but I hate selling it. I suck at it!” They say these things in conversations and repeat it over and over again inside their mind, either fearfully or with disdain. Then when faced with the need to actually sell something, anything, they get paralyzed, run away, or botch the experience entirely. I know because I was one of them.

Watch the full session and read on to learn more from our GRWE (Get Ready With Entrepreneurs) guest speaker, Dorothy Bossé - Inspired by Choice


In my corporate life there was a time that I was convinced I could never survive, much less thrive in a sales role. I resisted sales with the grace and elegance of a cat forced into a bath! Well, what we resist persists, and of course I got thrown right in, and had to face my fears head on. Not only did I step into a role where I had to motivate and coach seasoned direct sales professionals, I was also given my own territory to cover and my own sales targets. At the time I thought it was punishment for my sins. Today, as Master Life Coach and teacher, I recognize it for the gift that it actually was. The experience allowed me to learn what great sales is actually about, and do a firsthand study of all the blocks and barriers that come up for someone convinced they could never do it.

What is it about sales that bothers you, specifically? Have you ever really explored the question in depth?

Whatever your answer, I bet it’s some version of sales requiring you to do something you don’t think you can, and therefore be someone that you are not. You might even have an image of a sleazy, slimy pushy sales bully in mind when you say “I am not that, and I don’t want to be that!” And yes, I do recognize that those sales bullies exist (they really do!), but to refine all sales to just that is like saying:

  • Keto diets are only about eating bacon

  • Friendship is about gossiping about others behind their backs

  • Marketing is all about TV ads

Yes it’s there, it’s technically true, but it’s definitely not the only option, nor necessarily the best option. The same is true for you and sales. You can actually be completely authentic and yourself (yes, even with all your fears and imperfections) and still be a great salesperson. In fact, the more real you are, the better you will be at connecting with your buyer and building that key relationship. The challenge is that by saying “I am not that” “I hate that” you’ve created an identity for yourself as a person that cannot sell effectively. In order to ever be able to sell effectively in the future, you now have to detangle yourself from that identity and build a new one. So how do you start to make the shift?

How anyone can become a great salesperson

Be yourself

Authenticity sells because it builds trust. Your energy introduces you before you even speak, so the more real you are, the easier it is for someone to like and trust you, and in turn want to buy from you.

Create a sales friendly identity

Start thinking about yourself and the sales process in a more positive way. To achieve this you may want to start with affirmations that sound achievable and true to who you are. Here are some possible examples:

  • I am developing my sales muscle authentically

  • I sell with authenticity and success

  • The more I sell the more people I get to help

Adapt an attitude of curiosity

Being curious, asking great questions and then actively listening to the answers, will allow you to build strong connections with your audience, really understand the problems they’re looking to solve. Then you can show them how your product or service can solve those problems using their own words. When someone feels really heard and understood, like and trust grows, and they are far more likely to purchase from you.

It’s either a yes or it’s market research

Stop fearing rejection: it’s not about you. When someone is not ready to buy, there is a ton of valuable information you can gather from their why. If you respectfully stick around, again with curiosity, you may learn valuable insights; perhaps the timing, positioning, or target audience can be tweaked to get the sale next time. Only those brave enough to ask will know.

If all this still sounds far to scary and out of reach, then you may need to start by taking a closer look at your fears in this space; especially the fear of rejection. The fantastic news is that whatever your fear, it can be tamed and overcome. There are great resources and people out there to help you through this process. All you need to do is open yourself up to the possibility that you could be more, do more, and still be you. 

Are you ready to make that mindset shift?


Guest Author:

Dorothy Bossé, is a Master Life Coach, Certified in Transformational, Life and Health Coaching, with 20 years of progressive experience across corporate sales & marketing. Through her company, Inspired by Choice, Dorothy helps entrepreneurs overcome the personal fears that keep them from really taking off in their business and their life.  She offers talks, workshops and private 1:1 coaching, where she provides the tools, support and accountability that allow people to unleash their full human potential and let themselves and their business thrive.

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